Yes I Do!

Well I might as well come right on out and tell ya, I have been slipping back into my little dark tunnel. This last couple of weeks have been exhausting from once again trying to wear that mask. That “I’m Ok” mask, but I’m not feeling well and it’s bumming me out. All I have done these last couple of days is lay back in the bed, I get up every morning and don’t make my bed anymore. The one thing I was so proud about was I got to make my bed up in the morning, this was to keep me from getting back in. Lately I just make it up enough, and back in I go. Life has been ok, and I have been handling this really well, but something has me going down that hole again. I’m trying so hard to keep it together, because my son needs me to be strong for him. My hubby apparently thinks I’m all cured, since I have been hiding from him again. I kind of feel on the edge a bit, the constant stress is tiresome. My motivation is diminishing, I feel like I’m not succeeding as I want to. I haven’t seen my therapist in a week or so, she called yesterday and I sent her straight to voicemail. I’m feeling like I just want to sleep forever, or until this episode of my life is over. I have been so many new things ging on, but I’m not enjoying anything. It takes me forever now to get back out of the bed to work on my projects. I’m happy to be getting out the house with work, but my body is in so much pain, I find myself resting every other minute. This then slows me down, a house that takes an hour turns into 2! I’m not getting much sleep at night, because my brain won’t shut off. Lord knows I don’t want to go back to the old me again, but I don’t really think that me was gone yet anyways. Oh well this was my confession to you all, I’m constantly trying to encourage everyone, but not listening to my own advice…go figure!!! Chat soon…

Ms. Fran


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